A Lesson Re-Learned

Dependent: unable to subsist or to perform any thing, without the aid of

Isn't this the perfect definition of a Christian?

I know. This word, dependence, is the absolute opposite of everything that our culture seeks to attain. Independence is the cry of the American dream.

And yet, as a follower of Jesus Christ, I know my own inadequacy. I'll shout from the rooftops that I am a miserable wretch without the grace of God. I see in my own life how selfish and utterly sinful I am without Him.

So, why do I need to keep learning this lesson, this lesson of dependence?

Why do I so quickly forget what it means to be dependent on Him, to know that I can do absolutely nothing good on my own? (John 15)

Over the past couple weeks, my main prayer has been, "Lord, make me like Jesus!" 

Over the past couple days, He's begun answering my prayer in a way I hadn't expected.

He's been showing me my sin. A neglect in abiding. A lack of love-induced obedience. My failure to completely depend upon Him. 

I've been so caught up in the busyness of life lately, that I've failed to give Him the first priority. Instead of allowing Him to wake me up in the middle of the night to pray or early in the morning to spend time with Him, I determined the amount of sleep I needed. Instead of giving Him the best hours of the day, I decided what I wanted to do.

And I wondered why I had been struggling to sense His presence? To be obedient? To know the Spirit's leading?

Oh friends, I have to keep learning this lesson...over and over again!
I AM NOTHING! HE IS EVERYTHING! 

When will I learn? When will this finally sink into my thick skull? 

Oh, He is worthy; He deserves so much more than my half-hearted love and obedience! And praise Him, praise Him, praise Him that He is so patient with His children! Through it all: every failure to abide, every negligence to depend, every time self reigns, He is faithful and His love has never changed! He is making me more like Himself by revealing my inability. He shows me out of love, so that I am led to depend upon Him afresh.

What more do I need to invoke me to worship, to joyful obedience? I have a Beloved like no other! No other Lover would bear with my weaknesses, love me through every failure, and graciously draw me back to His forgiving arms again.  And to think, He took my countless transgressions and gave me His spotless perfection! The God of the Universe sees me as righteous! Oh, what love! What glorious grace has been shed upon me, the chief of sinners!

"Nothing in my hand I bring,

Simply to the cross I cling;

Naked, come to Thee for dress;

Helpless look to Thee for grace;

Foul, I to the fountain fly;

Wash me, Savior, or I die."

Rock of Ages, Augustus Toplady

Singing through December~ Song #2

How is everyone doing this beautiful Monday morning? 

Thank you to everyone who participated in the first Singing through December post. It's been so encouraging to hear all of the songs you've shared. Thank you so much!

So, are you ready for the second Christmas song?

We're all "used" to the story of Christ's birth.We're so familiar with it that it can easily grow old. The following song beautifully describes the unfathomable awe of the incarnation. The great, majestic King of the Universe laid aside His glory and humbled Himself to the lowest place...to save us from our sin. Hallelujah!

Disclaimer: Clips in this video are taken from The Nativity Story. I know that it is biblically incorrect for the wise men to appear at the stable. So, please...just look past that, if you could. I was thinking about choosing a different video, but decided that the clips were a beautiful addition to the song. I hope you think so too.

Here With Us- Joy Williams

It's still a mystery to me,

That the hands of God could be so small,

How tiny fingers reaching in the night,

Were the very hands that measured the sky

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Heaven's love reaching down to save the world,

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Son of God, Servant King, Here with us,

You're here with us

Still a mystery to me,

How His infant eyes had seen the dawn of time,

How His ears had heard an angels' symphony,

But still Mary had to rock her Savior to sleep

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Heaven's love reaching down to save the world,

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Son of God, Servant King, Here with us,

You're here with us

Jesus the Christ, born in Bethlehem,

A baby born to save, to save the souls of man

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Heaven's love reaching down to save the world,

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Son of God, Servant King, Here with us,

You're here with us

What did you think of "Here With Us"? What's another of your favorite Christmas songs?

Resting on His Promise

I know. I know. It's been a dreadfully long time since I last wrote, hasn't it?

Well, life has been full...and the Lord is SO good...and next week is Thanksgiving and...where is this year going?

Lately, the Lord has been leading me through a time of disciplinary refinement, for lack of a better term.

You know those times where you think to yourself, "Boy, I haven't struggled with many "big" sins lately...I guess the Lord is really working on my sanctification,"? And then, because you feel so high and spiritual, you pray (even though you know you don't really need to), "Lord, if there are any unknown areas of sin in my life, show them to me. Open my eyes to any area that I haven't given completely over to You." You finish your prayer, feeling content that you are both an obedient and surrendered servant of the Lord.

A week or two goes by and suddenly, things change. The Lord starts revealing sins in your life that you never saw or had simply grown calloused to. To make it "worse," it's not the "safe reputation" kind of discipline. It's the kind where the Lord uses your parents, siblings, and friends to bring those sins to light. It's painful and it's hard. You ask the Lord why all of this is being thrust upon you and He gently reminds you of that proud prayer you spoke, asking Him to refine you.

Mhhmm...can anyone else relate? This is where I've been the past couple days, working through ungodly habits, confessing previously unrealized sins, and re-discovering the boundless grace and mercy of my Savior.

No, it's not fun....but truly, this is where sanctification begins, isn't it?! In brokenness. In repentance. In learning to lay myself and all my failures at the nail-pierced feet of Jesus.

I can claim that I've surrendered myself by prayerfully "giving" all I am to Christ. It sounds good. It feels spiritual. But if I plead for Christ to take all of me and then refuse when He comes to claim His possession, how is that true surrender? If surrender is merely lip action, I've only deceived myself.

Yes, it's a struggle, a constant struggle. It's all too easy for me to look at myself, see a host of previously unrecognized sins bogging me down, and become overwhelmed by my failures.

"It's too hard."
"I can never be victorious."
"I'm only good at failing; I'll never succeed!"

And it's true. Being victorious over sin is too hard on my own. I won't ever be victorious in my own strength. When I look at my resume, it's only a list of repeated failures and losses. But that's not where my eyes should be. Because I am "in Christ", there is now no condemnation and He has set me free from the law of sin and death! Hallelujah, what a Savior!

My eyes must continually be focused on Christ!

There's a beautiful example of this in 2 Chronicles 20. It says in verses 2, "Then some came and reported to Jehoshaphat, saying, 'A great multitude is coming against you from beyond the sea, out of Aram and behold, they are in Hazazon-tamar (that is Engedi).'"

Can't you just imagine this scenario?! It's a normal day in the palace of the king. Everyone is going about their business, when suddenly a messenger bursts into the throne room with terror written across his face. He stumbles before the king and announces that a great enemy has come against Judah and is already in the land, ready to attack. Panic fills the throne room, yet each voice is hushed to hear what the king's decision will be. The pale-faced king sits in silence for a moment, pondering the overwhelmingly grave news.

In verse 3, we find out his response. "Jehoshaphat was afraid and turned his attention to seek the Lord, and proclaimed a fast throughout all Judah."

I love how that was Jehoshaphat's first reaction. He was afraid, so what did he do? Turned his attention to seek the Lord.

In verse 6, he begins a prayer to the Lord in the presence of all the people. Notice the way that he approaches Him. "'O Lord  the God of our fathers, are You not God in the heavens? And are You not ruler over all the kingdoms of the nations? Power and might are in Your hand so that no one can stand against You." Jehoshaphat reminds himself and all the people of the character and power of  the God they serve.

And then, if you continue to verse 12, you arrive at the last sentence of his prayer... and one of my favorite verses.

"For we are powerless before this great multitude who are coming against us; nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are on You."

Isn't that just beautiful?! Oh, I have used this verse so many times, when I find myself overwhelmed by my sin. Just like Jehoshaphat, our spiritual enemy is seeking to devour us. And when we are fighting in our own strength, there is nothing we can do to stop him.

We have to come to the end of ourselves and cease striving in our own strength. Only Christ and His power through us will be victorious over sin. We must look to Christ and remind ourselves, like Jehoshaphat, who our God is and what He has promised to do on our behalf. And then, as we'll see from our story in 2 Chronicles, we must trust our God and praise Him that He will do what He has promised.

Let's pick up where we left off with Jehoshaphat. In verses 15-17, we read the Lord's response to His people's cry for help. "'Do not fear or be dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours but God's...You need not fight in this battle; station yourselves, stand and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf, O Judah and Jerusalem. Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out to face them, for the Lord is with you.'"

This is such an encouragement, isn't it?! To know and be able to stand on the promise that our God is with us and He will be our salvation!

One more quick point. After the Lord spoke to the people, observe their reaction (verses 18-19). "..All Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem fell down before the Lord, worshiping the Lord...[they] stood up to praise the Lord God of Israel, with a very loud voice." They praised and worshiped their God before He had done anything. Their enemy was still marching toward them. No victory had been wrought. They had every earthly reason to continue wallowing in fear. And yet, they didn't. Why? Because they stood on the promise of God, knowing that He would do all that He had said.

Oh, this is so convicting! How much more should we, who have been given the very Word of God and have the Holy Spirit dwelling inside us, take the Lord at His Word and charge confidently into battle, relying on His Word and the strength of His might?

O Lord, bring us to the end of ourselves. Show us our utter helplessness apart from You. Grow our faith in You and teach us to praise You, despite the circumstances of our life. Thank you for all of the promises that You've given us in Your Word. How blessed we are to be Your children! We look to You now and trust that You will do more than we could ask or imagine. Praise Your glorious name!

"Out of the depths I have cried to You, O Lord.

Lord, hear my voice!

Let Your ears be attentive to the voice of my supplications.

If You, Lord, should mark iniquities,

O Lord, who could stand?

But there is forgiveness with You, that You may be feared.

I wait for the Lord, my soul does wait, 

and in His word do I hope.

My soul waits for the Lord

more than the watchmen for the morning;

indeed, more than the watchmen for the morning.

O Israel, hope in the Lord;

for with the Lord there is lovingkindness, 

and with Him is abundant redemption.

And He will redeem Israel from all his iniquities."

Psalm 130

Our Sun and Shield

This morning, I was reading Psalm 84 and came across a verse I had read hundreds of times before.

"For the Lord God is a sun and shield..." Psalm 84:11a

Even though I had read that little phrase in the past, I had never truly stopped to ponder what that meant. God is a sun? and a shield?

So, I broke them up and did a little word study.

Sun: The sun is radiant, awe-inspiring, and beyond our physical comprehension. The sun gives light, just as God gives light to His children, revealing His ways, and exposing the darkness within us. The Lord grants to us the warmth and comfort of His presence, just as the sun gives us the heat we need to survive. But here is my main point. The sun is a blazing ball of pure gas, undiluted by any solid or liquid form of anything. So God, in all His splendid, blazing holiness cannot stand any spot of sin in His presence; it is simply impossible, for He would be defying His very nature of perfection.

Okay, keep that in mind.

Shield: For me at least, the Lord as our shield is a common picture that comes to mind. He rescues us from the flaming darts of the enemy and has secured a way for victory in every temptation. But today, I was reminded of another aspect for the word. It is the picture of Christ shielding us, not only from the enemy, but the very wrath of God Almighty.

Remember the picture of the sun. Before the spotless, blazing holiness of God, our sin and rebellion demand justice. The holy wrath of God was aimed at us, His disobedient, creation...until Christ stepped in as our shield.

As I was thinking about all this today, an allegory came to mind. It gave me a glimpse of Christ's sacrifice in a way I hadn't pictured before.

"There I was, face-down on the dry, sandy dirt, awaiting what I deserved. How was this happening to me? I had been so happy here, on the Road to Hell, living for myself, not once caring about God's laws. Why should I have feared God or had anything to do with Him? He only made life miserable, I had heard. Why would I have wanted to live for Him, denying myself and enslaved to some God who demanded all of me?

That day, I had arrived at the entrance to some desert, just having come out of Vanity Fair. I had had an exciting time at the fair and was reminiscing on the memories, until I saw the sign; the sign that welcomed me to the very place I should have steered far away from. It read in big black letters, "The Desert of Holiness: Sinners Shall Be Judged By Almighty God."

I joked to myself about the so-called "justice of God", flippantly daring God to strike me down, while boasting that I would be the first sinner to cross the Desert of Holiness and come out alive. Confidently, I strolled through the gate, telling myself that even if there was a God, I didn't need to worry. Those Christians had always told me He was a God of love. Surely then, He wouldn't judge me for being a sinner. Would He?

As I continued along the way, the sweat from the intense heat poured down my face. On the side of the path stood another sign, smaller yet in the same bold lettering: "Repent! Only the blood of Christ can save you!"

The blood of Christ?! I scoffed to myself. "I don't need Christ!" I shouted to the heavens, "I can save myself!" My voice echoed through the sandy mountains and taunted me as it rang out, "I can save myself! I can save myself!"

Suddenly, a Voice shook the heavens. "There is none righteous, not even one; there is none who understands; there is none who seeks for God; all have turned aside, together they have become useless; there is none who does good, not even one."

For a moment the Voice paused, allowing the sound of my throbbing heart to drum in my ears. He began again.

"You have turned aside from Me, My little creation. I formed you with My hands, wrought you in the deep, but all you have done is rebelled and sinned against Me, your holy God. I am a Righteous Judge, and your innumerable sins demand complete and total justice. You deserve My wrath, My absolute, perfect wrath; you deserve no love, no goodness from Me."

There I was, face-down on the dry, sandy dirt, awaiting what I deserved. How was this happening to me? As questions raced through my mind, I shielded my eyes from the blinding light that penetrated my very core, exposing all the evil deeds of darkness that I had willfully allowed and participated in. He was right. I deserved every bit of His wrath; I had done nothing but spite Him every day of my life. I was a filthy wretch and didn't deserve to live. Knowing the verdict, I prepared to die under the weight of the wrath of God.

But then, it happened. Instead of feeling the wrath of God, I felt the weight of Someone kneeling over me, His arms surrounding me, encompassing me with His soothing Presence. I felt a warm breath on my ear, as another Voice, similar to the first, whispered to me, "No, you don't deserve My love or goodness, but My Father has chosen you. I have come so that you may have life. You will be Mine."

My mind was pulsing. Who was this? Was this Jesus Christ, the very One I had disdained and scoffed at? If so, what was He doing? Without a moment's warning, the sky turned black. The ground shook and I buried my face back into my hands. The first Voice shook again from heaven declaring, "You, like a sheep, have gone astray, you have turned to your own way; but I, the Lord, will cause your iniquity to fall on Him."

I turned my head, as much as I could with the weight of Christ still leaning over me. But as I saw the sky out of the corner of my eyes, I was horrified. The heavens had completely changed; they were now opened, looking like mighty curtains. Giant arrows entitled "the wrath of God" were poised in my direction. Weapons of metal, they dripped with burning poison and were tipped with balls of fire. My heart stopped at the sight of them.

The whir of the arrows sounded, as they were released from the mighty bows of heaven. I paused, expecting the pain, but instead only hearing a loud groan behind me. Christ's last words pounded in my mind, "You will be Mine."

Something wet and sticky ran down my face. I struggled to wipe it off with my hand. It was then that I realized what it was.

Blood. His blood.

The gravity of everything overwhelmed me. The words of that second sign, which had lined the desert's path, flashed across my mind. "Only the blood of Christ can save you."

I was a wretched sinner before God Almighty, deserving His full wrath and justice. Yet, at the moment of my punishment, Jesus Christ, the perfect Son of God, had wrapped His arms around me and became my shield, taking the complete wrath of God upon Himself...

...for me. He had given His perfect, sinless life for my wretched, vile one? Questions flooded my mind, but a victorious cry slashed through the silence.

"It is finished!"

The debt had been paid?! My sin was gone?! The wrath of God had been removed?! Tears filled my eyes as the blood continued seeping down my face. And as it did, I knew I was being changed. A new life was entering my body and my old heart and mind were dying underneath the flow of that precious life.

My Savior stood, strong and mighty, joyful and glorious. Sitting up, I turned around and for the first time, beheld my majestic Lord.

I was overwhelmed. How could I do anything but fall face down in His holy presence? "O Lord," I cried, "forgive me! I have lived a life of sin and rebellion against You. I only deserve Your wrath..."

"My little child," He called as He extended His hand, "Rise and come near. My blood has washed you clean. Here," at this, He held out a resplendent robe of the purest white, "this is the robe of My righteousness. I have purchased you; you are Mine. No longer are you a slave to sin, but an adopted child of the King of Kings."

As He covered me in His robe, He stepped back to admire me.

"Yes, you are ready," He beamed, taking my hand.

"Come, let me introduce you to your Father...."

"And you were dead in your trespasses and sins, in which you formerly walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, of the spirit that is now working in the sons of disobedience. Among them we too all formerly lived in the lusts of our flesh, indulging the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, even as the rest. But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved). For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them."
~Ephesians 2:1-5, 10